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Teach your child the power of saying "no" in an assertive way! |
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Refusal skills allow your child or teen to know how to handle the frightening experience of being asked to use alcohol or other drugs. Practicing refusal skills teaches your child how to handle such dangerous encounters with confidence. Remember, children have a strong need to be with peers and they can make the wrong choice if the peer pressure is strong and they don't have a ready response that allows them an out.
Refusal skills are for children of all ages - from lst grade to 12th grade. The basic component parts of Refusal Skills are:
1. Make a Bold Statement1. Make a Bold Statement
2. Say No! and Identify the Trouble
3. Say No! and Identify the Consequences
4. Suggest Alternatives
5. Assert Yourself
My Mom said alcohol is bad stuff! It's not for me!2. Say No! and Identify the Trouble
You shouldn't have ________, that's bad for you!
You know drugs are bad news! I'm outta here!
That's trouble and I don't want any of it!
No! Alcohol is bad for you and will make you sick.3. Say No! and Identify the Consequences
No! That's a pill and you don't' know what it will do to you.
No! Drugs are against the law.
No! My parents don't allow me to do that.
No! Drinking and driving is against the law!
No! If I take that I could get very sick, maybe die!4. Suggest Alternatives
No! If I do that, I would get grounded for weeks!
No! If I get caught I could go to jail!
No! I could loose my driver's license!
"Instead, let's go _____________ ..."5. Assert Yourself
... to my house and watch a movie
... to my house and study together
... to the mall
... ride our bikes
... to the library
... skating
Well, I'm gonna ______. You can come, if you want.Depending upon the age of your child, engage your child in finding appropriate responses that they can use confidently. Allow for time to practice each skill individually and then role play what has been learned. There are lots of creative ways to work with refusal skills. Have fun with them. And realize something else: by taking this time to teach your child refusal skills, you are actually teaching them to be assertive, which is one of the strong characteristics we see in people who become leaders. What a great gift to give your child!
Well, I think that's a bad idea, so I'm going home.
No Way! I've got things to do at (school, home, friends house), and that's where I'm going!
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© 1999-2000 Janice Nardi
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